American men will rush to get you in bed as quick as possible, while European men don’t appear to have the same rush (or desperation). European men don’t ‘date’ – in the formal way that Americans are used to.
The types of dates seen in movies – the formal ask, the fancy dinner and the entire dance that ensues simply doesn’t exist in the European mindset, in fact, the word “dating” isn’t even a part of their lexicon. Unlike American culture, where there’s almost a rite of passage which takes two people from “hooking up” to “seeing each other” to “dating” to “exclusive”, these labels just aren’t a focus or concern for European men. Rather, the mentality is, “I like you, I want to see you, and if it’s enjoyable, let’s keep seeing each other”.
But I cannot tell you how often I hear the same from British women.
Hollywood would have us believe that they are romantic, misunderstood and - even if we leave them for another man - likely to move to Tennessee and build us a house on a lake with blue shutters and await our return.
How does a girl from Texas end up with a tendency to go after English guys? Three years and four English boyfriends later, I was left wondering the same thing.
In my defense, I'd say Gwyneth Paltrow, who recently announced her separation from Chris Martin—who, in turn, blamed the breakup on his own lack of enthusiasm for life—would probably understand the initial attraction.
This undoubtedly says more about the type of men I go for than it does about North American blokes as a whole.
Now, when I discuss the differences between European and American, I’m referring to a mindset. American men on the other hand, tend to be goal oriented, with the aim of getting laid.
You can very well be born in America but have a more “European” mindset and vice versa. Perhaps this ‘score mentality’ is for bragging rights, perhaps it’s for validation so they can feel wanted and desired, or perhaps it’s a pure ego play.
Literally, they different and stand out as such – different clothes, accent obviously and even scent (which is very nice, just to clarify) – hence making them desired, possibly more than they actually deserve to be.
Everyone seems to celebrate Independence Day, these days.
He was English, witty, slightly bumbling, and had a crooked smile. He was also part of an emerging pattern: He wasn't the first British guy I'd romantically clicked with. When I first moved to Beijing right after graduating from Brown, I never intended to fall for so many English guys.